The three key things I try to live my life by would be, in no particular order:
-it costs precious little to be kind
-living well is the best revenge
-never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.
the first rule of Fight Club is never date anyone whose favourite film is Fight Club
(Source: harmfully-korine)
Once a boy looked very sadly at me after a little bit of conversation. ‘you’re so smart’ he said, ‘I feel like I couldn’t keep up’. And then he did that sad boy face where you’re supposed to agree to tone yourself down. So I said ‘probably’ and fucked his mate.
some top advice from a slut, here, 90% of the time when some boy looks sad and tells you you’re too ‘x’ to keep up with it’s a ploy to get you to cut bits off yourself so you can come down to his mediocre level; instead, agree with him and fuck his mate
Guys who say dating sex workers is “hard” would have a lot easier time if they stopped thinking of their partners as their property
OOP
@ strip club customers: I can promise you the dancer giving you a lap dance is not thinking about you or how *~sexy~* you think you are at all, we’re thinking about the food we’re gonna snag from the 24 hour convenience store after closing. This sexual performance is inspired by bbq chicken wings my dude.
😂
Cannot count how many times I’ve zoned out during boring doggy thinking about what I’m going to cook for breakfast-dinner.
(Source: disaster-rat)
“Bad books on writing tell you to “WRITE WHAT YOU KNOW”, a solemn and totally false adage that is the reason there exist so many mediocre novels about English professors contemplating adultery.”
Joe Haldeman (via rachelfershleiser)
I cannot reblog this enough, this is hilarious to me.
(via inkblot101)
(Source: goodreads.com)
(Source: catsbeaversandducks)
I really hope they got her drift.
I guess that’s why they have so many plates.
I want to know whose fault this is.
Completely ignoring conventional wisdom about clashing patterns.
In sex work you either feel like 1. Wow did i literally just get paid $1000 for sucking dick for 5 minutes!?! I am the Grand Master Hoe wow she 👏🏼did👏🏼that👏🏼 steve jobs who? Im gonna sell this pussy for the rest of my LIFE and become so rich Or 2. Nobody has emailed me in 4 days im gonna die 🙃🙃🙃 im ugly and disgusting and i shouldnt have entered this work im gonna die alone and hungry and broke next week bc nobody wants to buy this pussy goodbye friends it was nice knowing yall
Oh god yup
(Source: normalgorl)
(Source: nailpornography)
having a body is weird…I don’t like it,,I’d rather be a concept..an idea
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